Date Nights

Many couples who come in to see me are suffering from what I call “roommate syndrome”. They are still committed to one another and are still in love, but they admit that they are not close anymore. Usually upon further inspection, I find that most couples have completely disregarded the ritual of going on dates with one another. Most of the time when I confront couples on this, they have various excuses as to why they no longer date. They say that they are too busy with kids and schedules, they do not have money for going out or for babysitters or they just plain forgot to make time for each other. In my experience, I see that regular date nights improve the quality of relationships dramatically. When time is made for one another, the effects go a long way. Couples report that they once again feel like a priority to one another, they feel closer, more intimate, more relaxed and have more fun once they schedule regular date nights. Dates do not have to be expensive or even outside the home, all that matters is that time was set aside to be together and that nothing else will trump that. I suggest that couples pick a regular night or day that is good for them to schedule a month’s worth of dates, each of them take turns planning each date and getting babysitters and so on, and when the date arrives, they each commit to not taking phone calls or otherwise be distracted during the date with their partner and they agree to not cancel unless there is an emergency. Once couples commit to this, I find that they have a more difficult time then they expected actually coming up with dates. I have compiled a list of possible date ideas for couples to use as they learn to court and date one another again. Feel free to use this list yourself to plan your month’s dates.
DATE IDEAS
Tram Ride ($20) and dinner at the Tram restaurants
Dinner at the Chef’s Table at Bocca de Beppo
Dinner at a new and exotic restaurant and a movie
Hot Tub Soak (Betty’s Bath & Day Spa – $12 per person for ½ hour $22 for 1 hour)
Albuquerque Ghost Tours or other Tours of Old Town
Explora Museum Adult Nights
Swimming at a local pool
Double date with friends or family
Isotopes games or Lobo sporting events
Bingo
Casino night at any of the local casinos
Tea House (St. James Tea Room)
Cooking Classes
Ice Skating at Blades or Roller Skating at Roller King
Couples massage
Bowling and glow bowling
Hinkle Family Fun Center (Mini Golf, Go Karts, Laser Tag, Bumper Boats, Nickel arcade)
Cliffs Amusement Park
Motorcycle or Car Ride
Walking or Working out together
Railrunner to Santa Fe
People Watch and window shop at the Mall
Nob Hill Shopping, Eating and Drinking
Spy House B & B
Pool at Slate Street or other Pool Hall
Shooting Range (Calibers)
Karaoke at many bars in town
Painting Corral or Art Attack
Hobby Class
See a Play or Musical (local or traveling performances)
Zoo & Aquarium
Zoo and Aquarium summer concerts
Museum (Art, History, Natural History, Rattlesnake etc.)
Planetarium
Dollar Movie
Picnic
Set up a back yard drive in
Monster Truck Rally
Dessert at The Melting Pot
Krispy Kreme
Red Box movie night
Board game night
Wii or Xbox game night
Play a sport together
Hooters or other adult themed establishment
Concert and live music venues
Rodeo
Putt-Putt Golf & Games
Dave & Buster’s Arcade
Chuck E. Cheese, IT’Z and Peter Piper Pizza for food, arcade and ticket winning fun
Go Kart Racing
Local ballet or orchestra performances
Hot air balloon ride
Local events (parades, holiday events, community events)
Weekend getaway
Specific interest dates (ComicCon, Book Club, and Burlesque etc.)
Dance Classes